Whether the head of the household spanks over or under the clothing makes a big difference. Most tend to think of bare-bottomed spankings when thinking of the act itself, which is totally normal. The majority of couples in domestic discipline relationships spank bare-bottomed which is a perfectly acceptable way to spank. Bare-bottomed spankings are by far the most common way to spank. There are essentially three ways to conduct a spanking when it comes to whether or not clothing is involved: 1) Over all the clothing; 2) Over the underwear/pajamas; or 3) Bare-bottomed. All three are acceptable, but all three have pros and cons.
Over the Clothing
When referring to an “over the clothing” spanking, we’re referring to spanking over all layers of clothing one would wear on a regular basis. A standard situation would be something like jeans worn over underwear, but this could also include anything else that may be worn as multiple layers.
PROS: Not embarrassing/humiliating for the submissive partner; can be done quickly; no resistance from the submissive partner as far as removing clothing; convenient; generally not sexually arousing.
CONS: Medically the worst way to spank; the HoH must strike more times; the HoH must strike harder; easier to cause bruising; the HoH cannot see the results; not very psychologically effective (the submissive partner may not understand they’re “in trouble”).
Over the Underwear/Pajamas
When referring to an “over the underwear/pajamas” spanking, we’re referring to the submissive partner wearing underwear only, or a very light article of clothing only (like pajamas). Basically one thin light layer of clothing only.
PROS: Good “median” between over the clothing spankings and bare-bottomed spankings; psychologically effective (the submissive partner understands they’re “in trouble”); the submissive partner does not become overly embarrassed/humiliated; the HoH doesn’t have to strike as frequently or as hard as over the clothing spankings; medically better than over the clothing spankings.
CONS: Can be difficult to get the submissive partner to cooperate/remove their clothes; the HoH cannot see the results well; more painful than over the clothing spankings; can be slightly embarrassing/humiliating for the submissive partner; can be sexually arousing.
When referring to “bare-bottomed” spankings, we’re referring to the submissive partner wearing nothing to cover their buttocks.
PROS: Medically the best way to spank; the HoH doesn’t have to strike as hard or as many times; the HoH can easily see the results (to make sure there is no bruising/welts); the HoH can see where the strikes are landing; psychologically effective (the submissive partner understands they’re “in trouble”)
CONS: Can be very embarrassing/humiliating for the submissive partner; hurts more/stings more (on the surface); can be difficult to get the submissive partner to remove their clothing; can be sexually arousing.
We recommend over the underwear/pajamas spankings the most frequently. The reason we recommend over the underwear/pajamas spankings more often than bare-bottomed spankings is because it lessens two unnecessary elements to a spanking: 1) Less embarrassment for the submissive partner, and 2) over the underwear/pajamas spankings generally aren’t as sexually arousing as bare-bottomed spankings. It’s best to avoid the temptation of sex as much as possible in a discipline situation. In addition to those two reasons, spanking over the underwear/pajamas also gives the HoH the option to escalate the spanking into a bare-bottomed one if the submissive partner does not cooperate in some fashion.
A couple doesn’t necessarily have to pick one of these options and stick with it every time they spank. Couples can do the spankings different ways depending on the severity of the offense. In the end, the head of the household should determine how the spanking is to be conducted.
How do I help my partner to cooperate with removing their clothing?
Ask nicely the first time. “Okay honey, let’s get your punishment over with as quickly and as smoothly as we can. I need you to take off your jeans please.“
If the submissive partner doesn’t cooperate the first time, get a more strict the second time. “I’m not going to ask you again. You need to take off your jeans. Stop dragging this out.“
If the submissive partner doesn’t cooperate after the second time, we recommend they be administered corner time until they’re ready to listen, be respectful and cooperate.
Who should take off the clothes? The HoH or the submissive partner?
We recommend the submissive partner take off the clothing. It helps with the psychological factor of the spanking process. By them removing their clothing, it shows they understand and accept that they’re “in trouble”, and shows they accept the consequences for their actions.
Over or under the clothing is a very important aspect to a spanking. All three of these options are effective if executed correctly, and couples are encouraged to find what works best for them.