Personal: Domestic discipline resolutions update

A little over 6 months ago, at the beginning of the year, we sat down and listed out a few of our domestic discipline New Years resolutions for the year. Now that this year is half over (crazy, right? Time goes by so fast.), I figured we would go ahead and recap how we’ve been doing thus far.

new-years

Clint’s Resolutions

Clint’s first resolution of the year was to be more consistent. Truth be told, Clint has been consistent for a good 90-95% of the time that we’ve been practicing domestic discipline, and for that I am grateful. However, he isn’t perfect at it and so I was happy to see that this made the resolution list. Since the beginning of the year, Clint has done a pretty good job at “stepping up the consistency”, I’d say. He was able to recognize when things were a little off track, and we did a one day boot camp to fix that. I think it really helped both of us, and “jumpstarted” the consistency again. I’ve also been staying out of trouble which I think has made Clint feel not as consistent, but in reality there just hasn’t been anything to punish for. So, overall, I think he’s been doing pretty good with this resolution.

His second resolution was to “update our domestic discipline”. By that, he meant it was time to do an evaluation of what’s working well (in terms of rules, etc.) and what we need to redo or rethink. It’s something we do every so often, and it’s always really helpful when we do. This was another one that I was happy to see made his list because it needed to be done. And, I’m happy to report that it was. We sat down one night, after our kids were in bed, and re-wrote our rules. We also started making a domestic discipline binder (more on that in a different post, once I get it finished!). During that time we also decided to address a few issues (mainly me being argumentative or not always obeying certain things) in a one day boot camp, which I think helped us both to “reset”. Clint stayed true to his word and successfully completed this resolution, and it’s been great for us.

And finally, his third resolution wasn’t solely a domestic discipline one, but it was to spend more time with our family. But, from a domestic discipline standpoint, it does mean to spend a little less time with the blog and a little more time with us. We’re hoping you all didn’t notice too much, but we actually have been spending less time here at Learning Domestic Discipline and, instead, have been scheduling most of our posts in advance (most, not all) and only answering emails about once a week instead of three times a week, etc. We’ve made some subtle changes here and there that may not be so evident from a Learning Domestic Discipline perspective, but from a family perspective it has really freed up a lot of our time. It’s also allowed us to become more excited about Learning Domestic Discipline, I think, since we aren’t so immersed with it anymore. I feel like we still have a little more work to go in creating that perfect balance for us, but we’re getting there!

Chelsea’s Resolutions

My first resolution was to stop cursing, and I’ve got to be honest – it’s been a challenge. This year started out kind of rough because I was so used to doing it. Cursing when a driver would cut me off, if I stubbed my toe, when I was pissed off at a customer service rep – you name it. However, I’ve slowly been learning to let it go, and replace those curse words with alternate words, or just simply not use them at all. I tend to curse when I’m either one of three things- overwhelmed, stressed, or angry. However, I’ve been finding alternate ways to release that stress or anger, and it’s been helping. But, I’m definitely not perfect at it and it’s been a work in progress. That’s a much harder resolution than I thought it would be!

I also really wanted to complete year 2 of my No Spanking Challenge. Originally, I wanted to start it earlier but I put it off until recently, and am now getting ready to get at it again. I haven’t been spanked in quite some time, but I haven’t formally started any challenge. So, I guess I didn’t do so great with this one. But, I’m hopeful that when I do finally start my challenge, I’ll be able to complete year two.

My third resolution was the one that I like to refer to as “just say okay” and I. suck. at. this. It’s getting better (hey, improvement is improvement, right?) but it’s not where I want it to be, unfortunately. I would love to be able to say I’m doing great with it, but I’m just not. Honestly, Clint’s never given me a reason not to trust him with his decisions. But, even still, I find it hard to just say okay to some of them. I want to know why, or I want him to hear my one billion reasons why I disagree. And, although he’ll always listen to them, it seems like somewhere down the line those types of conversations turn into disagreements and it could just all be avoided because a good 90% of the time, he’s right. I’ve got some great posts coming up that illustrate that perfectly, and how my “just say okay” method really could have avoided so many of those disagreements. But, in the meantime, I’ll just leave it at this – I need to do better at this. I’m really trying, but it’s still not where I want it to be.

So, those were our six resolutions that we chose at the beginning of the year and six months through the year, I’d say they’re going okay. I’m proud of us for sticking with these six resolutions and really working towards them, but it’s disappointing that I’m just not doing as well with it as I wanted to be at the “six month check-in”. Time to step it up for the next 6 months.

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