Happy New Year everyone! If you haven’t been to the Learning Domestic Discipline blog since 2016 you may have noticed quite a few changes, including a new posting schedule for the year. Well, that new posting schedule officially kicks off today!
We had a list of great blog post ideas for today, but we figured this was a great time to talk about New Years Resolutions. According to recent studies, over half of the world makes a New Years Resolution. However, the amount of people that actually keep their resolution is a different story. People make resolutions in all categories from financial to health to professional to family. And yes, even domestic discipline.
You may remember that last year we wrote a post on domestic discipline New Years Resolutions for you to consider. Things like getting more involved in the domestic discipline community, communicate better with your partner and research or read more about domestic discipline. Well, this year we have three more resolutions for you to consider adding to your list.
Tell One Person About Domestic Discipline
We figured we’d get the hardest one out of the way first. Talking to others about domestic discipline is something that a large majority of domestic discipline couples feel they can’t do. They worry about what their friends, family, neighbors, co-workers, or whoever it is they are telling the lifestyle to will think of them. How will they react?
These are all understandable emotions. Telling someone “in real life” about domestic discipline can be challenging. But, what about starting off with something less intimidating? Are you involved with any online groups, forums, etc.? If so, and you see someone who may benefit from having domestic discipline in their relationship, why not share it with them? You could do so anonymously. If you believe in the domestic discipline lifestyle and the benefits it has for your relationship, we strongly encourage you to share it with others. You never know who’s relationship you may help.
Focus on Improving One Area of Domestic Discipline
It’s likely that almost everyone can pick one aspect of their domestic discipline relationship that they wish to change. After all, no one is perfect. One resolution some couples may want to consider is really focusing in on the one issue in their domestic discipline relationship that they wish to change the most. Is it following the rules more? Being more consistent? Being more submissive, or dominant? Communicating with your partner more? Or something completely different? Regardless of what the issue is, some couples find it useful to block out the more minor problems and really zero in on the issue they’re struggling with the most.
You may be surprised how addressing that one issue may translate into other areas of your relationship. For example, if you’re struggling with inconsistency, you may be surprised to see in what ways solving the inconsistency problem may make other (smaller) domestic discipline issues shrink or diminish. By focusing on one issue at a time it will allow both parties to solely focus on resolving that one problem instead of the distractions and worry of fixing multiple problems at one time.
Communicate, Communicate, Communicate!
One of the most important aspects of a domestic discipline relationship is communication. Last year we talked about setting aside one hour (or so) each month to sit down with your partner and discuss what areas of domestic discipline are lacking, or needing improvement and we’re echoing that resolution again this year. Sitting down with your partner and discussing anything every so often, free of distraction, helps to strengthen your relationship as a whole, as well as domestic discipline specifically.
Here are some “starter topics” that may help you open the doors to communicating more with each other:
- Make a list, and discuss it together, of 3 ways you feel domestic discipline is working for you and 3 things you would like to see improve.
- Discuss what your biggest goals are (both personally, professionally, and from a domestic discipline standpoint) for the month (or the year) and ways you can help each other achieve those goals.
- Discuss how the previous month was. What went well? What could you improve on?
These are just a few resolutions to consider making for the new year. And, while we don’t typically make New Years Resolutions, we have made a few of our own domestic discipline ones this year.
Clint’s Domestic Discipline New Years Resolutions For 2018:
- Be More Consistent. Yeah, it’s probably a cliche resolution for an HoH to make, but the truth of the matter is that I do need to be more consistent in enforcing our rules. The pregnancy made this quite challenging for me at times. I let a few things go more often than I should have since punishing my pregnant wife is even harder, emotionally, than punishing her under “normal circumstances.” It’ll be a challenge again in 2018 with two kids under the age of 3 running around, but I need to be more consistent for our home to be a more peaceful one.
- Update our Domestic Discipline. What does this mean? Well, it’s about time my wife and I sat down together and revised our rules list. It’s about time we discuss things that are and are not working well for us when it comes to domestic discipline. We verbally come to a mutual understanding on these things between the two of us, but I feel more formal agreements would make everything more “official” and organized. We haven’t done this for a couple of years, so I want to make sure we do it in 2018. It’s time to update it all.
- Devote More Time to My Family. This is probably a popular one of both domestic discipline couples and “vanilla” couples alike. It’s an important one, no question. I want (and need) to make changes that free up more time to be with my family. How does that relate to domestic discipline? Well, Domestic-discipline.net takes up a lot of my free time (Chelsea’s too). Thankfully, up to this point, my wife and I have been able to run the blog without it interfering with our time together as a family. But, with a new baby in the house, this is going to get increasingly more difficult to pull off. So, as evident from our new posting schedule, some changes will be made to free up more of my (and Chelsea’s) time. Family is the most important thing, and I’m going to do what I must (both with Domestic-Discipline.net and other responsibilities) to ensure that I maximize my time with my family.
Chelsea’s Domestic Discipline New Years Resolutions For 2018:
- Stop Cursing. This seems to be the one thing that I just can’t break, and it’s going to get me in trouble sooner or later. To my credit, it’s drastically decreased. But, whenever I get overly stressed or frustrated I tend to totally forget to think before I speak, and it drives me crazy! Clint doesn’t care if I cuss (unless it’s in front of our son, then it becomes a problem and it’s a rule..) but I’d like to just cut it out all together. It’s just not necessary, so I’m working (hard!) at not making this a bigger issue than it needs to be. Bottom line- I need to fix it on my own before it gets me in trouble!
- Complete Year Two of My No Spanking Challenge. This may sound impossible to some, and even to me it sounds ridiculously difficult, but I’m determined. I completed year one and it felt great. Can I make it another year? Honestly, I really hope so.
- Just Say Okay. This is one I started trying to work on towards the end of last year and it went okay but I know I could do better. At some point last year I got in this ridiculous habit of feeling like I need to question decisions that my husband makes. It’s awful, and I don’t know where it started from. But when he makes a decision, I feel like I have to know why, what the plan is, how come he came up with that choice instead of this one, etc. etc. etc. and I don’t want to be like that. I want to be able to just say okay, and trust that the decision is the best for us, and our family. Looking back on the times when I have been able to just say okay and let him make the final decisions has, honestly, been way better for us. It’s less stressful, it allows him to lead in the way that truly is the best for our family, and it allows me to be a submissive wife which is, ultimately, what’s important to me. So, I’m aiming to get back to that spot where I don’t feel like I need to question everything and where I can just let things happen the way they’re supposed to happen.
So there you have it. There’s our resolutions for 2018, and a few for you to try! What’s on your New Years Resolution list for this year?
From our family to yours, we wish you a wonderful 2018 full of fun, good health and good luck.