Ask anything!

{The contact form is below, but please read the following first.}

Many people have posted comments to various posts on this blog. Some of these have been genuine comments, while many have been questions. Since I would like to see questions kept separate from comments, I have set up this post for people to ask questions by posting a comment. Do not post questions to other posts, especially the Punishment Book, which should only contain written records of specific punishments for misbehavior.


Some questions are best sent directly to me via email. I am always very careful with email addresses. I take care to protect your privacy very carefully, just as I protect my own. I have no desire to invade your privacy or to compromise your anonymity.

However, if you prefer to ask your question in a public forum like the Domestic Discipline blog, you are welcome to post your question here. Just like the other posts, comments to this one will be moderated. Moderation means that I must anonymously approve them before they appear on the blog. I will approve the majority of questions unless they are blatantly offensive, rude, disrespectful or absurd. Please also confine your questions to Domestic Discipline, not to other practices such as BDSM.

Do not post questions asking me to justify the Domestic Discipline lifestyle. If you don’t agree with Domestic Discipline, you should not be reading this blog, because it is going to annoy you mightily! If the thousands of words in the other posts on this blog do not convince you of the need for and the benefits of Domestic Discipline, then no answer I can give you here is likely to change your mind. Please don’t waste my time with questions of that nature, because they will simply be rejected without explanation.

The comment moderation system does not allow me to explain why a comment (or question) has been rejected. I only have two choices: publish or reject. Reflecting carefully on what you have written before posting your question will increase the chances of me pressing the “publish” button and reduce the chances of me pressing the “reject” button.


Before you post a question, please read the other posts on this blog! For example, don’t post a question on tears or crying UNLESS you have ALREADY read the article called “Tears.” I realize that this seems like common sense, but some people are lazy and would rather waste my time than spend a small amount of their own time doing some reading for themselves. If you ask a question that is answered by another post whose title is the same as your problem (eg “Tears”), you can expect a very terse and blunt reply from me. I am happy to help anyone who needs it, as long as you take the basic initial steps to help yourself first. I will happily give you some of my time, provided you don’t waste my time.

Please be aware that I have a life aside and apart from the Domestic Discipline blog. I have to earn money just like everyone else. I may not always be able to respond immediately or quickly to your questions. You will just have to be patient. If I am able to answer your question within a given time frame, I will do so. If not, you will just have to wait. DO NOT POST REPEATED REQUESTS for an answer, because you will be making a nuisance of yourself and you will risk never having your question answered. I know that some of you may be in a hurry. But I have limited amounts of time available. You must respect that, or your questions will be ignored. A blog is not the place to post questions which are an urgent matter of life and death. If you have an emergency, please call 911. Otherwise, post your question here and I will eventually answer it.


17 thoughts on “Ask anything!

  1. Hello, I am and have always been a women in need of domestic discipline. Since I was a child I felt the need to be corrected and spanked when needed for correction. Its a part of who I am. My parents did not ever spank me as a child. As an adult I became very ashamed of this part of me, thinking there must be something wrong with me. I became great at seeing controlling trats in men and would seek them out and push buttons to get a reaction when I felt the need to be Punished. The problem was I was too embarrassed to tell anyone the way I needed to be Punished, and many times these men were abusive! There is definitely a difference between loving yet unpleasant correction and being in an abusive relationship. So I have been single for many years afraid of being drawn back to abuse. However, since then I have discovered that I’m not alone and there is nothing wrong with me.. I discovered that Domestic Discipline Relationship lifestyles are out there and can be normal and healthy. I have finally accepted who I am and am embracing my need to be disaplined in a safe and loving way. But now I don’t know how to meet single men that are interested in DD. Most dating sites that I’ve tried I get men that just think of spanking as a sexual thing. For me it has nothing to do with sex. How do I find someone that wants the same thing I do?

    1. Wow Christina,

      happy new year and welcome! I think you should check out the forum – we just opened a dating section 🙂
      And no, spanking is all about discipline! You’re absolutely right.

  2. I have been looking at any and all information about dd relationships and would like to get more info from somebody who lives the lifestyle. What chat rooms would anyone recommend? I have so many questions and really do not know anybody to ask.

  3. Why do i feel angry with myself and regret ever trying to talk to my significant other about this life style ? Why when i ask to be guilded does it always come back to i don’t listen and argume ts are my fault? Is there a line to draw on trying to start a healthy DD lifestyle?

  4. When is the 2018 retreat? I would love more information, and think it would be fantastic to surprise my hubby with it for Valentine’s Day!

  5. Hi, there! I am very excited about the prospect of the dating section y’all started but I can’t find it in the forums section. I’m probably blind as a bat but could you point me in the right direction? Thanks!

  6. Hiya, is this the same Clint and Chelsea from the previous website and Twitter? Why did you both suddenly stop using Twitter a few years back and are you back to writing new posts?

      1. It also doesn’t seem like these are new posts–I seem to recognize them from before. Are you going to start writing new content at some point?

        1. Hi all, if you must know, we stopped posting for various reasons. One of them was a mere burn-out (among other reasons). We might write new posts in the future but for now, neither Chels nor I have the time to do this.

  7. Hi everyone..

    My husband and I are pretty new to this we are slow but steady maybe more slow! First off this Is the best site and has already helped so much my husband and I both subscribed to the blog and that has opened many doors for communication.. I have a few questions tho

    We bought the beginners boot camp book and we are hoping for a child free weekend soon. However maybe we missed it but we couldn’t find how long each spanking should last on day 2?

    Also my husband feels weird about the day 1 lecture any tips would be great.

    There have been a few times that i was deserving of a punishment and or maintenance would of been helpful and because we have a 14 year old at home it was skipped (not that my bum is upset about it) but it’s frustrating we have been trying to commit to this and he has tried to be consistent in the other aspects of this life style but weird as it is I feel like I’m getting dupped. Obviously this isn’t something we are going to share with our kid or our family so how do we maintain consistency in the moments I should be over my husband’s knee and life just doesn’t allow for it.

    And lastly we have been trying to pin down our rules would anyone be willing to share some of theirs maybe give us some ideas we haven’t thought of….

    concreate for us is:

    No spending without permission (over 100)
    Communicate plans at least a day or 2 in advance
    Maintain my personal goal of at least twice a week at the gym
    Save x amount every paycheck
    (Recently iv noticed warnings coming my way for talking back so I’m going to Also add no talking back!!

    Thank you so much everyone your all appreciated 🙂

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